Friday, October 10, 2008

Some Good Advice From's 'City Survival Tips'

  • Give homeless people cigarettes, if you want free drinks later that night. Good Karma.

  • When no means no, it’s best to just put on your pants and go.

  • If some fool you live with tells you that he didn’t mop the floor in six months because it "doesn’t bother him" move out.

  • Rich Girls: Love them because its hard to. When you’re down they’ll be there–with there boots in your face paining for a lick. Hate them because its easy to, and no one is going to look down on you for doing it.

  • Knives: Pack the ox, especially with the stock market crash. For a while there wasn’t anything to worry about and you didn’t have to carry illicit street weapons...Get with the program if you want to keep that PowerBook on a dark night in Brooklyn (yes Willamsburg included). (ed.: See here) Knives are so in (your chest if you’re not careful) right now.

  • Free Lunch: Gone are the days of robbing the whole foods buffet. There are too many hood fools that don’t want to loose their jobs watching you eye that dumpling. Be real about it and get tight with your locally bakery so that you don’t starve. Come through at closing and you’ll get hooked up with all the bagels and muffins no one else wanted...

  • Getting over on the MTA: This is hard because we all know how old Chinese men ruined this for us. What I could suggest is calling in to the number on the back of Metro cards to get the MTA to send you receipt vouchers in case you need to commit some fraud on your expense report. Also faking sick with an urgency to go home because you lost your wallet could get you a free ride if you’re patient plus insistent.
You can check the full list from Posthood here. And now here are some added value tips from NYC The Blog,
  • Those discounted monthly or weekly metro cards people try to sell you? The real deal, and if your suspect about it ask if you can swipe it for a balance check.

  • People will occasionally approach you in the park, or on the street, looking to get rid of stuff they found. Also pretty legit. It's easier to determine if that is the case when buying a camera or functioning piece of electronic, as opposed to a Patek Phillipe watch, which may or may not be real. Due diligence is called for, and you can get one hell of a deal.

  • For smokers: it is common for bodegas and delis in less affluent neighborhoods to have a stock of cigarettes that are sold below the state minimum. Just ask them, "what are the cheapest cigarettes you have?" They'll produce some fine generics for 5 dollars.

  • When walking by a pile of stuff on the street being disposed of, def grab something with resale value if it's easy to carry. An old framed poster, old books, or records maybe. The books and records can be sold at stores that buy that stuff. Put the poster of a vintage nyc street scene on Craisglist and/or Ebay for 12 dollars. Gladly take the money.

  • Be nice to your neighbors, baristas, shop keepers, newstand guys. Buy them a tea in the morning. Say hello. Shop at the same deli/corner store/coffee shop/newstand place as often as you can. Those people will get your back in a moment of need.

  • Volunteer. That shit is the bomb, people will appreciate your effort, and show you they do.
Anybody else have good tips or suggestions to share? Leave them in the comments and we can update this post.

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